WAYS TO IRRITATE YOUR PROFESSOR

Last Updated on Tuesday, 30 November 1999 00:00

Jokes - College Jokes

* Leave permanent markers by the dry-erase board.

* Ask whether the first chapter will be on the test.  If the professor says no, rip the pages out of your textbook.

* Hold up a piece of paper that says in large letters "CHECK YOUR FLY". (at least for the Male profs)                                           

* Address the professor as "your excellency".

* When the professor turns on his laser pointer, scream "AAAGH!  MY EYES!"

* Relive your Junior High days by leaving chalk stuffed in the chalkboard erasers.

* Sit in the front, sniff suspiciously, and ask the professor if he's been drinking.

* Correct the professor at least ten times on the pronunciation of your name, even it's Smith.  Claim that the i is silent.

* Sit in the front row reading the professor's graduate thesis and snickering.

* Feign an unintelligible accent and repeatedly ask,  "Vet ozzle haffen dee henvay?"  Become agitated when the professor can't understand you.

* Wink at the professor every few minutes.  (Hey you might even get a date if he/she is cute)

* Every few minutes, take a sheet of notebook paper, write "Signup Sheet #5" at the top, and start passing it around the room.

* Start a "wave" in a large lecture hall.